matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize