Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
