I feel like I'm in dance class right now
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
