is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
My bed smells like the plague
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
