ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
