Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
