And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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