I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
