You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
