Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
