oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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