I looked at my own cervix.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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