Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm just crazy horny about you
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize