I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
