and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
