it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
