im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
