You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize