The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Sorry about my life...
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
