I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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