no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
