i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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