He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
