I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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