How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
