i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
