apparently the secret to your success is patron
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
