I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
