People with herpes should wear stickers.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
you made out with another girl for some wings
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
