Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
