u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
