My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize
