Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
