Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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