I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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