Ambien. No doubt about it.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Randomize