Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
