Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize