Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Randomize
