i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
