I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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