Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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