I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
