My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
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