At least make sure they are 18
Why
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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