David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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