why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
