I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
