my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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