I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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