My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize