i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
